Toxic Masculinity

I’ve just about had it up to my eyeballs with toxic masculinity, gender policing, and the idea that men can only go to women for emotional labor rather than themselves or other men.

Today has been really trying to piss me off on this one particular topic and I’m done.

Men should have feelings. Men should be able to talk about feelings, particularly with other men. Men should be responsible for their own emotional health. Men should be aware of the emotional labor they are asking their partner to perform and make sure they are offering that emotional labor back.

“Being a man” should not preclude taking care of your family or your house or cleaning or giving your kid a bath or hugging your mom or your brother or your son. It shouldn’t preclude being sad when something bad happens. It shouldn’t preclude seeking professional help for depression or other painful things.

When was the last time you asked your wife if she’d had a rough day?

When was the last time you asked your buddy if he was happy in his relationship or if he was struggling with anything at work?

When was the last time you hugged your son or let him cry without making him feel bad about it?

When was the last time you let your kid play with what they wanted to play with whether it aligned with stereotypical gender roles or not?